Wednesday, 11 February 2015

Valentine's Week:- Promise Day

I turned. To look. But night was dark. And I lost. The stars started to shine out of the clouds after a while.
So much of human life is wasted in waiting.
I was waiting. He was waiting. In anticipation and retrospection.

I do not blame him
for not knowing 
the gentleness of my soul.

When I only showed him,
how  violently 
I loved.

So we never want things to change but worry ourselves to death introspecting changes. I was  scared about how changed our equation would be now. A part of me thought that how disappointed could he be! I mean he already called me hippo and what not. He knew I’d rather gobble down a pound of cake with him than go hiking and bird watching. He knew I would star gaze rather than spend the night sleeping. I was me. I hoped with all my heart that he was he too.

Those years.. years were they? Those years long, the promise of tomorrow, shone bright in our lives and today he was on his way to fulfill it.

The little me:
I was naughty but not deliberately. More often than not I would be caught in acts of innocent crimes. I mean my darling little sis wanted a doll. How difficult can it be? I knew where the doll was and I knew where the money was. All I had to do was go get it. Which I did. L Obviously I was punished.
But that day after a good scolding while I slept in a pool of tears alone and hungry, my sister had sneaked in some snacks for me to devour and gather up energy to fight my cause some more. We had each other’s back. Always.
 The promises we never made were the ones that we kept the most.

As me and him had stood on the pavement overlooking the sea. His friends honking the cab, calling him out he had handed over a letter and left with a little peck on my cheek. The tremble of that brush had stayed with me. Up until now.
There was  bang on my door not ring. Bang! I got up jolted back from  a reverie. Thrice in four days. Firsts, a lot many firsts around. As I unlocked Aashi(My little sister) pushed open the door came in and hugged me screaming something.
“Jiji.. where have You been?? We’ve been sick worried calling you!”
I collected my thoughts and asked her “You weren’t supposed to come till next week?”
“Yeah! So am impulsive like my successful elder sister! Speaking of success, have you left Your job? Saying this she jumped perching herself on the bean bag(the only descent piece of furniture).
“No.. ofcourse I haven’t.”
“So why ain’t You in Your office right now?” saying this she reached for the snack box kept on my bed and tumbled upon the labyrinth of papers. And came across!! Oh my God.. I reached to grab the letters and box but she was quick.
An hour and two sobs later she knew the entire story. I knew she’d understand my predicament so i was looking forward to some consolation from her.

She gave me a glare through her spectacles and kicked me in the shin. That was when I noticed a box rolling out of her back pack. Now It was my turn to grab open the box. Which I did.
A string of heart shaped confetti rolled out. Each with a candid moment of me captured and a rune like mark on each. An infinite promise of tomorrow. 

Aashi gave me a  wink.
The promises we never made were the ones that we kept the most.

Swati Kaushik

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