Life without Facebook

“ I’m going so fast that I can’t slow down

It’s hard to get up when you’re spinning round and round

I’d tell you the news but nothin’s changed

I’d sing you a song but they blew it away”

        -California Waiting by Kings of Leon

I can’t even sum up Facebook in two words put together ( Face and Book) , the way Mark Zukerberg did thinking, ‘ Hey, this is Facebook, a simple name to simplify your life.’ Oh Mark, I wish it was that simple. While driving in a fast lane, I might just pop in my password and take a stroll down my Wall thinking if I can’t call up my best friend, I could always write on her wall right? This process might also gain some attention towards the new Display Picture I just uploaded (especially from my ex who  has ‘un-friended’ me but somehow still is in the friend list of my best friend). See, how useful Facebook is?

 But what if I am not a busy person? What if I am the most “ Vella” person of all time.     A STUDENT !

Trust me, Student-ship is a kind of volunteering where you have no money and ample of Time! All you have to do is sit down (to study). Now, think of the horror that as soon as the student sits down, there is this tempting, anxious , delirious urge making his/her brain cells wanting to swim deep into the myriads of display pictures, statuses, trolls, messages and friend requests. I mean, there’s no such rush experienced when there’s a new friend request or when someone accepts you request. What an adrenaline junkie fun!

So, below is the life sans Facebook-

1)    You get to focus! A student will study more. A working person won’t have to deal with 100 notifications or no notification( I know how much depressing it is when you open your facebook after so long and there’s zero notification. No one Missed you !)

2)    You get to block out stupid people ! By stupid people I meant, the ex, the condescending friends with better jobs  or better colleges, the Candy crush players who every time are sending you virtual Candies and they haven’t even pinged you once since 2009, when they first became you Facebook friends.

3)    A peaceful life without any drama. How many times I and my friends have cried in front of each other ranting about some post we saw on Facebook. Sometimes, our love interest is flirting with a girl, or friends being cheeky on a status, embarrassing us, in front of all the 1000 virtual friends( I mean, who does that ? ) or someone uploading photos of the trip that we missed. Facebook is such a tease!

4)    You are actually being missed! Doesn’t it feel like everybody is watching you? Like there’s no privacy. You are online so much that people starts taking you for granted and there are no actual calls or messages. As if, being the most private person, you are still judged, evaluated and figured by people you don’t even talk to. So as soon as you let the days go by without Facebook, you see a miracle. Your phone rings and a friend says, “ dude, where have you been?”

Now, last but not the least-

5)    You are fired from Half baked beans because you didn’t check your mail since you no longer sit online because you are trying to avoid facebook website as the URL page will just kick in your OCD. Facebook is the fastest means of communication. More than phone calling, phone message, (can’t include ‘whatsapp’ because we don’t share numbers), and mail. Facebook provides Secret groups and Half-baked beans pages which lend all the information and let us spread the articles like the one you are reading. Think of the Horror that I would have experienced if I wasn’t on Facebook and none of my friend knew about this article. I can’t live with that nightmare. What can I say? Even though I have final exams next month I thought about leaving Facebook but it just didn’t feel right.

 I would have loved to get my lonely life back but I can’t because I am not living in one. We are left with stuff to manage. So, the advice is to Use it or Dispose it or just Manage it.

 Namarita